E Left the Maple Rd House

I really tried to be a mother figure to E. She had went through some really tough things in her 18 years of life. She and her 4 sisters were adopted after her grandmother grew ill. The grandmother had took the girls after their mom wasn’t able to care for them.

Unfortunately, E was abused in the adoption home. I want go into the specific details out of respect for E. That is her story to tell if she ever chooses too. She had been several places after aging out of the foster system and found herself living with her birth mom when she and I meet each other on the social site.

I had been a stepmom to Rick’s 3 boys, even having the 2 oldest living with us. So I did have some experience but I was definitely not equipped to help E in the manner she really needed. I had my own mother wound that I had no clue was there. Looking back today and remembering the events I was trying to help someone that had a very emotional childhood like me. But honestly, I had no clue what I was doing and had no business trying to help E.

I know that I created more tough times for E and myself in hindsight. My heart was in the right place but my awareness and skill level was covered by my own wounds and my unconscious behaviors. I would flip back and forth in my role with E as a mother figure and then just a friend. It was a very emotional experience for us both.

We had a good Christmas that year together. I was excited to be able to get her a few things she needed and it was nice not to spend the holiday alone. After my divorce in 2015, holiday celebrations were pretty much null. I was just trying to to find my place in life once again.

E finally got a job at a local restaurant and she was working most days and making new friends here in our local area. It was a busy full life for us both. E was dating some and so was I. We were still connecting with our friends we had made on the social site. We did make several trips to south Alabama to see R. E and R were pretty close too.

Both E and myself would get on the social site a lot and communicate with people. This was a source of some conflict between E and I. It was almost like we were both in high school at times. I tried to be the adult and use a level head in our disagreements but my own wounds and shadows prevented me from successfully creating a healthy relationship with E as a mother figure.

It was around the year mark that E decided she wanted to move out and roommate with one of her coworkers at the restaurant. I didn’t think E could afford to do this. She had her car payment, insurance, and her cellphone which I had gotten service in my name to keep her cost down. E also would now need to pay half the rent and utilities. She didn’t have to pay anything living with me.

E keep asking and I agreed to loan her a little money. Her plans were to get more hours at work or a second job if she had too so that she could afford to have her own place with her friend. I am sure you already can feel this didn’t turn out like either of us had hoped for.